As of late, Nicole and I have been hearing tales of girls in our dorm (we live in an all-girls dorm, mind you, so the action is few and far between) wanting to have a "Pleasure Party". Now for those of you who don't know what a Pleasure Party is, it's basically like a Tupperwear Party (a bunch of women, in that instance, usually menopausal, who sit around and discuss which kitchen wear is the best for preserving food stuffs and then proceed to pay for the overpriced items in question), only with sex toys. Nicole and I consider ourselves to be not only pretty mature for our ages, but also rather progressive in our thoughts on such parties. Because, really, we would attend such a party only because of how funny it would be to see our friends sit around and chat about which vibrator works the best when the Mister is not around to provide some lovin'. So we thought, 'Cool. Where and when would such a party happen, since we obviously can't have 30+ girls in a small, prison cell-like room filled to the brim with sex toys?' But then things took a turn for the worse when our RA heard about it through the grapevine. Suddenly the Pleasure Party turned into a "Let's All Get Together and Learn About Our Respective Vaginas" Party. Woah, woah. HEY. Nicole and I don't roll that way, Miss RA. Our RA single-handedly managed to turn what sounded like a fun, frivoulous girl-bonding time with some laughs thrown in into this Den of Iniquity where the walls are covered with tacky wallpaper with a fleur de lis print that's peeling off in sketchtastic areas, with gauzy, sheer curtains hanging all around with all of the girls writhing on the floor masturbating to a background of Enya, Charlotte Church, and Josh Groban. SO AWKWARD. We would commend her for this stunning feat if it weren't for how grossed out we were by the idea of it, how weirded out we became by even thinking about Pleasure Parties. So, thanks RA. Thanks.
The following is the dialogue Nicole and I had on the topic when it was first brought up:
Mia: I still can't believe that our RA took the idea of a pleasure party to mean that. *shudders*
Nicole: I know. I'm not sure what her fascination is with all of our "danger zones" but I personally have no interest in sharing that particular moment with any of you. No offense.
Mia: It's cool. I just think it's awkward that she felt the need to ask all of us about it. If she was so interested in pleasure parties, she could have just googled that shit. I know that she may have no problems discussing her sex life with others, but there are just some things that I don't need to know about, and her sex life is definitely one of those things.
Nicole: *shudders* I am so creeped out right now. The more I think about this, the more disturbed I become. I'm sure that's not a rational reaction....she just makes me want to vomit. Can I say that? Do you think she looks like a chipmunk?
Mia: *laughs* No joke, I think I just threw up in my mouth a little. I think she reminds me of the squirrels we have on campus! Those are some scary little bastards. I seriously hope that if the plans for this party goes through, that she's not invited. I don't think I could handle how awkward that would be if she was all, "Oh-kay, laaadies. We're going to go around in our liiitle circle discussinggg our sexual adventures." And yes, she DOES drag out her words like that.
Nicole: You're so right!! She sounds just like that, except in a 5-year old, baby voice kind of a way. No, I'm sure she would make it so much more awkward and uncomfortable for everyone. "So, I'm sure you don't even know where your clitoris is..." And we would all gape at her forwardness. She's insane and unpredictable. Wait, we may need her there. I mean, at least we'd have something good to talk about (and I'm quite positive she'd be the first to volunteer to try out the titty tassels. Kodak Moment!)
Mia: Nicole. Stop reading my mind. For serious. Because you KNOW that, at first, everyone would feel so awkward until someone broke the ice with the pasties. She would be one who would break that metaphorical ice. I feel like I should appalud her for her special brand of crazy. Brava! *claps*
The following is the dialogue Nicole and I had on the topic when it was first brought up:
Mia: I still can't believe that our RA took the idea of a pleasure party to mean that. *shudders*
Nicole: I know. I'm not sure what her fascination is with all of our "danger zones" but I personally have no interest in sharing that particular moment with any of you. No offense.
Mia: It's cool. I just think it's awkward that she felt the need to ask all of us about it. If she was so interested in pleasure parties, she could have just googled that shit. I know that she may have no problems discussing her sex life with others, but there are just some things that I don't need to know about, and her sex life is definitely one of those things.
Nicole: *shudders* I am so creeped out right now. The more I think about this, the more disturbed I become. I'm sure that's not a rational reaction....she just makes me want to vomit. Can I say that? Do you think she looks like a chipmunk?
Mia: *laughs* No joke, I think I just threw up in my mouth a little. I think she reminds me of the squirrels we have on campus! Those are some scary little bastards. I seriously hope that if the plans for this party goes through, that she's not invited. I don't think I could handle how awkward that would be if she was all, "Oh-kay, laaadies. We're going to go around in our liiitle circle discussinggg our sexual adventures." And yes, she DOES drag out her words like that.
Nicole: You're so right!! She sounds just like that, except in a 5-year old, baby voice kind of a way. No, I'm sure she would make it so much more awkward and uncomfortable for everyone. "So, I'm sure you don't even know where your clitoris is..." And we would all gape at her forwardness. She's insane and unpredictable. Wait, we may need her there. I mean, at least we'd have something good to talk about (and I'm quite positive she'd be the first to volunteer to try out the titty tassels. Kodak Moment!)
Mia: Nicole. Stop reading my mind. For serious. Because you KNOW that, at first, everyone would feel so awkward until someone broke the ice with the pasties. She would be one who would break that metaphorical ice. I feel like I should appalud her for her special brand of crazy. Brava! *claps*
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